A few weeks ago I asked what I should review next, and you told me vape pens—which is not what I would have picked. I’m a joint guy. But because I’m a man of my word, I went out and spent $90 on three vapes and gave up joints for three days. Find my verdict below.

Plus, a federal appeals court just wiped out a $32 million verdict that a Michigan grower had already won, Menominee is back in court over dispensary licenses, Detroit cops shut down a smoke shop on Joy Road, and I found 15 grams of hash rosin for $70 in Muskegon.

Roll one up. Or puff your vape. Whatever.

I’ve always thought of vape pens as the instant coffee of cannabis—fine in a pinch, never the thing you actually wanted. But a few weeks ago, you guys voted on what Michigan cannabis product I should review next, and vapes won by a landslide. So, I went out and bought three half-gram live rosin disposables from three different companies and put them to the test.

All three were worth the money, which is not a sentence I get to write often. But one of them cost me an entire Saturday afternoon, and I learned something unexpected along the way.

FINE PRINT: A federal appeals court ruled that it won’t enforce contracts to buy and sell weed, wiping out a $32 million verdict that a Michigan grower had won against two Curaleaf subsidiaries. Hello Farms had a deal to sell its 2020 and 2021 harvests, and when prices collapsed, the buyer stopped accepting deliveries. The 6th Circuit found that executing that contract required committing a federal crime, and growing and selling weed still qualifies.

CAP FIGHT: A pending petition drive could lead to four more dispensaries in the city of Menominee—formally increasing the local cap from nine to 13 stores. Organizers say they turned in more than enough signatures to get the measure on the November ballot. A group has challenged the measure in court. Now, a judge is set to decide what happens next.

SMOKED OUT: Detroit police shut down Fire Cloud Smoke Shop on Joy Road after officers set up a sting operation and caught the staff allegedly selling marijuana without a state license.

BABY STEPS: A researcher at Henry Ford Health landed a $1 million federal grant to help pregnant Michiganders cut back on weed. The funding follows a recent study that found an estimated 16% used cannabis during pregnancy or while breastfeeding, and that prenatal exposure has been linked to low birth weight, preterm birth, and more NICU admissions.

SHELF LIFE: Leafly dropped its top 10 strains for September, and most of them are widely available at Michigan dispensaries. Glitter Bomb took the top spot, followed by Dante’s Inferno, Black Maple, and Scented Marker. Also on the list: Toad Venom, which I reviewed here in July.

ICYMI: This is the last time I’m going to bug you about this one. Our official poll to determine Michigan’s highest rated cannabis brands closes on Sept. 30. You can vote for up to three different brands. Write-ins are welcome. The full results will be released here in October.

Last week, I asked how old you were when you smoked your first joint. About 80% of you said 16 or younger. Another 15% or so picked 17 to 20, which is still a few years shy of the legal age.

So, this week’s lesson is that almost nobody on this list has ever given much of a damn about being a law-abiding citizen. Kudos. I also chose a life of crime. It’s worked out OK so far.

And exactly one subscriber to this weekly cannabis newsletter claims to have never smoked a joint. I’m pretty sure that person is messing with me, but if not, email me. I have questions.

This week, I’m handing you the map. 

I recently put together the official stoner’s guide to Lansing. And now I’m planning out my next cannabis-focused road trip. Where should I take this newsletter next?

Cast your vote, and I’ll start looking at hotels. 

A lot of cannabis brands in this state market themselves entirely through Instagram. 

Very few of them ever show up anywhere you can actually talk to a human being.

Muha Meds is sending its staff to stand in the woods in Lake County this weekend.

The occasion is Pick’n in the Pines, a bluegrass festival at High in the Pines Campground in Baldwin on Sept. 18 and 19. The brand will have a booth set up there all weekend with cornhole, prizes, a photo booth, and a jewelry-making station—which is a lot more effort than the folding table and a stack of lanyards that usually passes for brand activation around here.

Candidly, I think Michigan could use a whole lot more of this. Fewer billboards, more time sending real humans to real events. There’s a difference between a brand you recognize and a brand you’ve actually had a chance to meet. Too few are bothering with the second one.

Sometimes you want the good stuff. Sometimes you just want to stop rationing it.

This isn’t the best rosin in Michigan. But it’s 15 grams for $70.

Lucky’s in Muskegon is running a new “max vape bundle” this weekend featuring 15 one-gram hash rosin carts from Play Cannabis for only $70. They ran this sale last weekend too, and there’s no telling whether it comes back again, so I wouldn’t wait around to find out. 

I’ll be honest: This is not a top-shelf product, and nobody is pretending otherwise. But it’s real rosin—not distillate—at a price where you can quit being precious about it. I think that’s worth something in a market where a single one-gram cartridge routinely sells for $20 or more.

The only real catch is geography. But if you’re making the drive to Muskegon anyway, be sure to stop over at IndiGrow while you’re out there. They’re the only licensed microbusiness in town, and they’re still growing the old-school landrace strains I wrote about a few weeks back.

There is no strain in Michigan that will prepare you for a one-point Detroit Lions game win. 

I tried anyway.  

Over the weekend, I picked a familiar Voyage Bloom strain that I previously reviewed here in June, smoked half of it just before “The Star-Spangled Banner,” and saved the rest for halftime.

Warheads is Gelato 41 crossed with Runtz, and the sour-candy name is a lie. It’s a total dessert strain—cheesecake, sweet cream, graham cracker, a little papaya, a touch of gas underneath. Plus, the high held all the way through a game that had no business going to overtime.

The final score was 31-30 over the Saints. Jared Goff didn’t clear 200 passing yards until that extra quarter, which is the only reason my parlay hit. I’d like to say I was calm about it.

I mention Voyage Bloom here constantly, and I want to be clear that nobody’s paying me to do it. I reach for them because they’re reliable, potent, and they roll with whole flower instead of shake and trim. That’s a low bar that too many other brands out there just keep failing to clear.

Cheers to football season, hoodie weather, and whatever the Lions are about to put us through.

Stay safe out there ‘Ganders. Remember that recreational cannabis is only legal in Michigan for ages 21 and up—and it’s NEVER OK to get high and drive.